Today is one of those days where I’m happy I’m not a smoker anymore because it’s so ridiculously cold outside. Can I say that yet? That I’m “not a smoker anymore”? I’ve technically not been smoking for 20 days, which is not even a month yet. It feels like forever, not because I miss it or anything, but because I don’t even think of smoking anymore so it seems like the days when I constantly thought about smoking was another life entirely.
It’s because of Zyban, the miracle pill. Before quitting everyone kept telling me how difficult it was going to be for me, how horrible I was going to feel, how hard I would have to try to stay strong, etc. But honestly, it wasn’t that hard. I only felt a little bad on the first couple of days, but nothing too intense. I had a bit of trouble sleeping, and admittedly, it felt a little weird to not be constantly smoking, but other than that I was a-ok.
In no way, however, am I suggesting that this is on account of my strong will power or strength of character. I fully acquiesce all credit to Zyban. Prior to Zyban, had I not smoked for 5 hours (more likely even less) I probably would have felt like ripping someone’s face off. Maybe even my own face. In other words, I would have been really, really angry and felt really, really bad. With Zyban though I was able to stop smoking altogether and pretty much not feel a thing. I don’t even understand how it’s possible, but it definitely works. I have no idea how I would have quit if I were not taking it.
This is not an advertisement for Zyban, I promise. I’ve heard a lot of bad stuff about it too. People having panic attacks, getting rashes, seizures. Bad stuff like that. Admittedly, I had a bit of a panic attack on the first night, I think anyway. My heart was beating really fast and I kinda thought I was having a heart attack. But it went away. Eventually.
I am just getting a little irritated when I tell people that I’m taking Zyban and they’re like, “ohhh-ho-ho watch out! I have a friend who took that and she ended up growing a tail AND all her hair fell out AND she went insane and jumped off a building!” Yes, I know there are side effects, and I willingly took the risk. So I have insomnia for a couple months. If that means I never smoke again, I think I can handle a couple months of discomfort.
Anyway, I’m not going to get all preachy and be one of those ex-smokers who tells people who smoke how I quit and therefore how everyone should quit. When I was a smoker (20 days ago, ha ha) I hated those people. Honestly, I’m just saying, I was a pretty intense smoker. I smoked more than anyone I know. If I can quit, ANYBODY can quit. I’ll leave it at that.
Oh and here’s a heads up that I wasn’t aware of before I went on Zyban: you cannot drink alcohol when you’re taking it. So not only do you have to quit smoking, but you also have to quit DRINKING. Which frankly, is much worse. Not only am I boring and have no social life now, but I have also realized that all my friends are actually quite boring too. You’ve been warned.
